Sorry for Unfollowing You

Gramaticall error. Sorry for using my bad English, cause I am to shy when written this with my bahasa, hehe

Honestly  I want to write this work  from last month. I already had a lot of ideas which is wandering in my mind, but because some of laziness, it doesn't happen immediately. It started when I began to question my social media’s fate, especially the fate of Instagram content, that I never satisfied with my Instagram feed and I always posted then delete it, more than twice, looking for the purely of beauty feeds.

Due to that, I rarely update the real world moments when I’m actually really happy just only because the photos does not fit to my Instagram feeds. Then I remembered a caption in a post that I forgot the account name, but the point is the term “Slave of Instagram”.

I don't realize that I had become a slave to Instagram, where every time I go or when there is an interesting moment, I always want some of photos at least is fit for my Instagram feed. 

Until finally , desire for it started to fade away, I started to get bored with my feed that didn't develop, how come it doesn't seem like my friends who can go everywhere so they can  take some photos that made their feeds interesting.

Okay maybe this is a childish reason just because someone else's feed is good so I want to go along too.

But the story above is a lie, that's not the main reason I decided to unfollow most of my following on Instagram. The main reason is because I don't want to kufr of graces that has been given in my life, then I realize that achievement of every human being is different.

I don't want to see my friends' ig story about their activities which is posted until it made a thousand dots. I don't want to see my friends' posts about their holidays, their marriages, their spouses, their jobs, their activities or whatever.

I don't want, when I was exploring instagram then look at friends' posts about their work, their marriage, their  activities, I have a mind, how come I work like this, how come I'm still single, how come I can't like them yet, how come I can't be useful for others like them, how come I just seem to be stuck here, how come I can't vacation like them, and a lot of how come.

I don't want to take a feeling, when I see friends' posts about their family, their  friendship story, their love story, I don't want to think, how come my love story isn't as beautiful as them, how come my friend doesn't like them with those thoughts and feelings.

Just simply of that, named it Baper. Yes. I am Baperan, that a sign that I’m just ordinary human. Sorry if I ever said "halah baperan ding" the truth is I also talk that to myself.

I decided to unfollow most of my friends and leave a few people that I don't really know and what their posts are useful for me to keep following them. Initially it was hard to unfollow my friends, I have a thought, what if my friends who are unfollowed become more communicating with me, I'm afraid what if I missed information about my friends, I'm afraid what if I can't update anything about what my friends done, then I think hard again.

Then about three days to week I decided to be or not to follow my friends. I did reflection again until finally my boasting-mind appeared. I thought, hello who am I, I'm not as popular as them, so if they just lose me as one of their follower, it won't affect on their lives either. I think, if  I suspend and keep following  them, then every time I open Instagram, I see my friends' posts, which make me take a thoughts and feelings which is can make me to kufr of graces that had given to me.

I don't want it. I want my Instagram to be clean of all posts that I think are not too useful in my surfing life on Instagram. I definitly not said that friends’ post is not useful, but for me its not my business. How I can explain it? I got confused. Hope whoever read this can understand. :”)

I also decided to unfollow  some of impersonating influencer whose posts were mostly endorsed. The intention following them is to know how inspirational their are but instead promote things that I dont want to buy. Sorry, but not sorry.

I decided to keep following some people that I dont really know. The reason is simple but many. The first, because this person when writing his/her caption are nice, crispy, frontal, but it doesn't look frontal. The second because this person, in my opinion matches to be influencer and certainly they never endorsed, just promoting the product that they used too. The third is because these people rarely post their activities, their post is about some art or writing that useful for my knowledge.

To be honest, I feel like I'm boasted, my followers not really that much. There aren't 700 people. How come, I'm as innocent as an unfollowed some people. There's actually another reason, but this might be my idealistic reason. So I cant write this anymore, hehe.

Actually, I want to post this article when it still September, because I haven't posted anything on that month, but it turns out, I am forgot and this is already December. And the inspiration for continue this worked have evaporated nowhere. Hmmm, now I understand, that writing is better done right away, the problem is when you want to continue on another time, the language is become different with the last one. So this article might hang up on- my idealism. I am confused about what I want to write ~ kekeke

Once again, I am really sorry for unfollowing you guys. But in the real world I am not unfollow and disconnecting with you, we’re still friends. Just because we quit from following each other on social media doesnt mean our friendship in the real world going to end.

Peace and Respect ~

20181002 – started to write this work with  BGM Downpour – Seventeen Vers.

20 Desember 2018 | K